g-babes & mema 2009 July

 

on Gavin's 6th birthday, Mississippi

left to right:Gavin, CJ, Eli, Jaxon, Mema (me), Nolan

The Brooks Bunch

 

Tom's family on his Dad's 83rd birthday ... yes, we enjoy sex, and procreated like rabbits ... Tom is one of six children ... the only one missing was his oldest brother Billy, he's always late ...

Easter 2009

on the bench, Jaxon & Valorie, Gavin on the tricycle ...
standing, left to right, Ty & wife Tiffany, me, & Tom

why i will be banned from mingling with gen pop

this lil encounter happened on 29 March 2009 ::

so, went to get cigarettes yesterday ... pulled into a parking space and went in -- got my ciggies and walked out ... there were 3 different vehicles that did not bother parking legally (though the spaces nearest the mart were open) but instead pulled in at various angles blocking me in where i was parked LEGALLY ...

as i was trying to back out a woman of about 60 who was standing in the parking lot talking to a man of about 40yo asked if she should move her car. i said "why bother, obviously you are too lazy, stupid, and pathetic to park correctly in the first place as are the other two morons that you are standing there talking too"

one of the men shouted "FUCK YOU, BITCH" KISS MY ASS!!" ... YOU CAN’T TALK TO MY MOTHER LIKE THAT !!"

to which i replied ..."you'd never get the chance, no i won't, and that explains you're stupidity."

he started walking toward the truck, so i pulled BACK into my parking space and as i was opening the door got my phone and began dialing the police ...

"THAT'S ALL YOU GOOD FOR BITCH --- CALL THE POLICE!!!"

i laughed and told Ranger to come on .... he had remained in the truck while i went into the tobacco mart ...


Ranger jumped out of the truck and looked at the man .... who - to have been so angry and aggressive one moment ago- moved pretty day'mn fast away from me and back to his vehicle .... as his momma and the other guy were running to their respective forms of transportation ... with the momma screaming ..."i got sick grandbabies in the car --- that's why i parked in the way!!!"

one day i will get my butt kicked ... well, probably shot ... no one will come close enuf to hit me ... but i will never learn ...

... it was hilarious ... and i was left standing in the parking lot by myself laughing like a maniacal fool ... with a bunch of shop-keepers staring at me from the store-fronts ... guess they (shop-keeps) were wondering if it was safe to come out.... AND they (fuktards) all had handicap tags and/or placards hanging from their rear view window ... but it must NOT have been a mobility handicap ... cuz the fuktards moved WAY too fast for that to be the case.


.

black hole sun

Hang my head
Drown my fear
Till you all
just disappear

from black hole sun ~soundgarden


humans...spending our time on this earth building walls...
walls to keep stuff safe: possessions, feelings, family.

but why?

to me that is the question, not "what is the meaning of life?"

the only thing that is truly MINE, is my soul and how i perceive life ...
the rest are just superficial trappings of a puny earthling...

i own nothing on this planet except my mind, my soul, my heart, call it what you will.

the rest moves in and out of my grasp.

i build walls around my life, have since the age of six, it's easier that way ...
never letting life's vagrancies enter into my reality ...

into my perception of "me"

is it good? no, i miss out on a lot that this existence has to offer.

is it wise? yes, it minimizes the pain of having no control of life.

when i do open my being, let the wall slip,
i pray for the relief of numbness ...
for the feeling that i am alone in this existence ...

do i blame anyone? no, this is my life, and only i hold the key to how i see my reality.

only i hold the key to my contentment.